- My secret office romance started during my stint at the official website for Major League Baseball.
- Working the overnight shift helped me and my now-husband to keep our relationship a secret.
- Despite challenges, my relationship outlasted our jobs, leading to our marriage.
It was the middle of the MLB postseason. Boston and Cleveland were matched up in the American League Championship Series, and we had a rare night off of work between games to celebrate a colleague’s birthday.
I was sharing a private moment with my boyfriend outside a bar when we were interrupted by hoots and hollers from our coworkers, convinced they’d caught us in an illicit embrace. But the truth was, we’d already been dating for nearly two years, and no one knew.
He was the first person to introduce himself to me at my new job
I met my now-husband two weeks into my first professional job out of college. As a production assistant for the official website of Major League Baseball, I got minimal training before being thrown to the wolves. I was left to my own devices to complete tasks I barely understood.
I was in the office alone on a Saturday, muddling through, when Paul walked in. He came straight to my desk and said, “I don’t know you.” He was the first person to approach me, the first to introduce himself. Six weeks later, we were dating.
On the overnight shift, it was easy to keep our budding relationship a secret
As the newest PA, I got the least desirable shifts — mostly evenings and weekends. Those shifts frequently overlapped with Paul, who managed the editors that cut game highlight reels.
My supervisor, who worked regular business hours, assigned me to-do lists and left me to my tasks. He didn’t care what I did with my time as long as the work got done. No one was looking over my shoulder, and most of the office was empty. It was the ideal place to fall in love.
Office politics weren’t as high stakes outside the 9-to-5. Facetime was less important. Meetings didn’t happen after regular business hours. There were fewer people to catch us flirting by the elevators. No one cared when we stepped out together to grab food. Staggered shifts meant we rarely arrived together, and by the end of the night, everyone was too exhausted to notice when we left in the same car.
Keeping our relationship under wraps wasn’t particularly difficult, especially in the early days. I wasn’t well-known in the office at the time, and Paul’s job making sure editors stayed on top of their game recaps didn’t leave much time for schmoozing.
When we did work together during the day, we kept our interactions brief, sharing a small smile or a discrete touch.
By the end of our first season together, a few people knew about our relationship, our summer fling that just kept going. Alex, who kept his head down, watching, but rarely interacting, figured it out on his own. Evi knew because I had to tell someone. She was shocked when I told her. I was delighted by her response.
It wasn’t always easy, though
And though part of the fun of those early days was sneaking away to canoodle in an empty cubicle, the late nights and overlapping but not matching shifts made things challenging. Late-night games meant some shifts didn’t end until very early in the morning. There were few date nights because we just didn’t have time. We ate breakfast together more often than dinner. One of our first and most pivotal fights stemmed from my desire to commute together, but my shift started an hour before his, and he had no interest in arriving early.
“This is why I didn’t want a girlfriend!” he yelled.
“Well, guess what! You have a girlfriend!” I yelled back.
I lost that fight. He was right. No one wants to spend more time than necessary at work, but he understood wanting to spend more time together. That fight confirmed that our relationship was strong enough to survive shift work.
By the time my second year began, I had been promoted and was working days. We overlapped less — he was still on nights — but we crossed paths often enough. The erratic schedule was hard, but helped move our relationship forward. He gave me a key to his apartment earlier than expected, so I didn’t have to wait for him to get home.
Once everyone knew, I worried about what my colleagues would say
He was a supervisor, though not mine, and I was scared someone would think I slept my way up the ladder. But it never came up. Keeping our relationship private meant my skills spoke for themselves. He helped me, but he was a mensch and would have helped anyone who asked.
Our relationship lasted longer than the job. I was laid off after my third postseason in 2008. He left a year later. When we married in 2011, a few of our former colleagues were there to see it happen. Nearly 18 years later, I have no regrets about my office romance.
